As I perused the comic section of an unfamiliar newspaper while on a
recent trip, I was baffled by the way a married couple was being portrayed
in an otherwise seemingly modern comic strip. Hurling insults, overt
disrespect, one-upmanship, sophomoric come-backs. I found myself thinking,
"Even Andy Capp and The Lockhorns weren't THAT obnoxious".
When I approached the final frame, I realized what I was reading wasn't
about a romantic couple, but a couple of siblings. Although the content
then made a bit more sense, it occurred to me that we've got some serious
work to do in the area of humor.
Where have you been getting your humor messages? Comics? Tv? Movies? Like
so many Disney productions where sibling abuse has become the standard,
expected interaction, I'm making a mental note to not waste my humor RAM
on those productions or this strip. When there is genuine, innovative
comic relief to be found in this world of unlimited options and
possibility, falling back on sarcastic, insulting interactions posing as
humor is, well, insulting! Surely we've come further than to always laugh
at the expense of hurting someone else! Haven't we??
What can you do about it? Parents have a tough job balancing their values
vs. cultural standards without having to be undermined by bad behavior
posing as humor.
So here's a thought: Recognize that you deserve better. Refuse to watch
the movies and shows made by production companies too lazy to create real
entertainment, substituting it with tired, rehashed situations that rely
solely on humiliation, then call it humor. Raise your humor standards, for
the love of Pete, and think before you laugh. Is this really humor, or are
you chortling out of habit, or duty, or discomfort? Ask your kids the same
question.
When you begin to step back and become sensitized to what you're being fed
as a consumer of entertainment, you'll cease to believe that siblings and
families have to interact a certain way simply because "everyone is doing
it". We don't want our kids to use that old excuse, it's time for parents
to follow that same advise. Be bold about being a model for your children!
What you do are what they're watching the most, by the way.
Natalie Tucker Miller teaches early education, adult education, and holds
certifications in coaching. She believes that parents and teachers have
many overlooked, undervalued challenges. As a coach and educator, she
helps her clients and students uncover their true motivations, so they can
enjoy what they do while inspiring others to their greatness! Visit her at
UnParenting.com.
