var quotes=new Array() quotes[0]='

So far no horse thieves or murderers have turned up, but I see there\'s been a bit of hanky panky preceding trips to the altar. David Kesterton' quotes[1]='

There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless. John Barrymore' quotes[2]='

When our relatives are at home, we have to think of all their good points or it would be impossible to endure them. George Bernard Shaw' quotes[3]='

Why waste your money looking up your family tree? Just go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. Mark Twain' quotes[4]='

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. George Burns' quotes[5]='

I grew up with six brothers. That\'s how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. Bob Hope' quotes[6]='

Family jokes, though rightly cursed by strangers, are the bond that keeps most families alive. Stella Benson' quotes[7]='

The only happy artist is a dead artist, because only then you can\'t change. Sylvester Stallone' quotes[8]='

Important families are like potatoes. The best parts are underground. Francis Bacon' quotes[9]='

If you don\'t believe in ghosts, you\'ve never been to a family reuinion. Ashleigh Brilliant' quotes[10]='

I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it. Rodney Dangerfield' quotes[11]='

The greatest thing in family life is to take a hint when a hint is intended - and not to take a hint when a hint isn\'t intended. Robert Frost' quotes[12]='

If you don\'t know your family\'s history, then you don\'t know anything. You are a leaf that doesn\'t know it is part of a tree. Michael Chrichton' quotes[13]='

How many husbands have I had? You mean apart from my own? Zsa Zsa Gabor' quotes[14]='

It seemed that my wife Shirley was always pregnant until we found out what was causing it. Pat Boone' quotes[15]='

Things are more like they are now than they ever were before. Dwight D. Eisenhower' quotes[16]='

Those who boast on their descent, brag on what they owe to others. Seneca' quotes[17]='

For the first half of your life, people tell you what you should do; for the second half, they tell you what you should have done. Richard Needham' quotes[18]='

They had been living in The Plains about 10 years, and were looked upon quite as people "of good standing and most desirable acquaintances" by local society, when some new people, called Kesterton, came into the neighborhood, causing considerable commotion in the aforesaid society by their coming. "The Plains," A Story - The New York Times, December 14, 1884' quotes[19]='

[Mr. Kesterton was a] photographic showman (who) gave one of the first public magic-lantern shows in South Australia at Adelaide in 1848. However, it is unlikely that Kesterton had prepared his slides himself, let alone added any of local interest, since his entertainment was reported to have \' attracted much criticism, the pictures being dull, poorly focussed and at times upside down\'. Early South Australian Photography' quotes[20]='

Not much is known about the ... 7-foot 8-inch tall ... Rev. Charles Kesterton. He was born around 1825. His father was one of the pioneers and his mother was an Indian, being a member of the tribe of the famous Malungeons. [For Malungeons] ... the number ten is very popular in children, but the rule is not imperative, some mothers having as many as twenty-two. It is claimed by many of his neighbours that he has killed at least seven men, but the old preacher denies this ... he says that he never killed so many. Cincinati Enquirer et.al. ' var whichquote=Math.floor(Math.random()*(quotes.length)) document.write(quotes[whichquote])